Late in the week I thought I really needed to do something productive and so started preparing songs of FOUND for Youtube. It was time consuming and I had to get my head around new software...but I enjoyed it.
And then came the voices. Voices telling me that it was a waste of time. Voices telling me that my life was a joke. Voices telling me to stop playing around with things I enjoyed and get out there like a real adult and contribute to society. Voices telling me that my life and my love of God and of worshipping Him with all that is in me is just self-indulgence masquerading as devotion.
Now, I'm used to voices, and over the years I have learnt that such voices usually surface when breakthrough is imminent. But they shook me, the guilt and the shame I used to live with reared their ugly heads and told me that I was worthless and a waste of space.
All this resulted in a late night call to my dear husband, working nightshift. After I had cried and confessed my dark thoughts he had one response; "Well, you've just got to stop listening to the wrong voices!"
Ugh...what...take responsibility for the thoughts in my head? What...take all those negative, horrible, life destroying thoughts captive and ask my Heavenly Father what He says about my life?
The Voice. The only voice that matters in the final analysis. The voice of the one who tore open Heaven to come down and get me. The one who tells me I am fearfully and wonderfully made. The one who says that He has a plan and a purpose for my life; a plan for good and not for evil. The one who did not leave me alone but gave me Holy Spirit to be with me always and to speak truth and love in me and through me.
The voice that tells me I am loved, that I'm his precious daughter made with divine purpose for his pleasure. The voice that tells me He delights in me and that he made me exactly how he meant for me to be and that part of the adventure is to discover who and what that is. Oh, and it is meant to be fun!
That is the voice I finally decided to listen to. That is the voice that inspires me to be all I was made to be and to encourage you to do the same.
Listen to His voice. It is the voice of love, it is the voice of acceptance, it is the voice calling you further up and further in. It is the voice of the one who looks at you and sees one that he stepped into time to save and to know as a Father knows their child.
Oh...and just to ram home the point...I got to church this morning and the preacher gets up and says..."This morning I want to talk about the voices that we listen to!"
God is speaking...let's incline our ear to hear him today!